by Aidan Encarnacao

What’s your favourite color?

What self care habits do you intertwine into your daily routine?
Make my bed. Drink water. Drink coffee. Exercise. Play / write music.   

What's your favourite book?
Tools Of Titans.

Who can you go to when you need to get something off your chest?
My piano or guitar.   

What’s your safe place?
My piano or guitar.   

Have you ever dealt with anxiety? If so, how do you calm your mind?
Since I was seven I’ve had chronic anxiety. It’s been a long journey to finding some inner peace and self understanding. To calm my mind I make sure I’m living my truth (meaning: doing what makes ME happy. Not what others want or expect of me) I think anxiety is a partly intuition and partly made up scenarios based off of associations/ memory or simply thinking the worst and too far ahead, stripping all rationality. I think artists have the worst time with anxiety, because being an artist takes believing in something that doesn’t exist yet and bringing it to life. So I guess just to be careful what you think is a good start to a calmer mind. I mean... that or you could just take a bath.   

Have you ever gotten yourself out of a dark place? Or have you ever needed to help someone else out? If so, how?
I have been in a few dark places.... a few (**cough cough**) times... (**sarcastic coughing continued... cough, lost count of times entirely... cough**)  People who helped me are my family, hands down. But subpar to that (because you can’t have my family... sorry) I would recommend different things for different circumstances? I know as cliche as it may sound Tony Robbins helped overcoming a seven year long struggle and additionally with applying productive routines and thoughts into my daily life that I still follow today. I also express anything I’m suppressing through my music. Others can do this through whatever feels cathartic to them individually.  AND newly- stoic philosophy has become a retrospective twist to my ever evolving beliefs. Find a credible idol. That’s a good start!   

Do you think social media affects your mental health or has any other negative impacts on you? If so, how do you best deal with it?
Wow. WUN HUNDRID PASSENTAH.  I 100% KNOW that social media is negative for mental health. 99% of the time it’s an infectious slime. We’re all addicted and externally seeking approval or reactions when we really need to look inward, face ourselves and make ourselves happy. That’s who you’re stuck with forever. YOU. I’m grateful to have music to dedicate my time to outside of social media, otherwise I can imagine as a younger girl I would have become a lot more reliant on it as a foundation of identity.   

What’s your biggest fear?
Probably... getting old and none the wiser.   

What’s the biggest change you can identify within yourself in the past year? Bending my character and stubborn beliefs beyond personal comfort to realise they were all made redundant by the joys of “letting go a little” brings. Control can destroy your joy or surface it, depends what end of the scale you function on. 
What’s one of the hardest things you’ve had to go through in life? How did you get through it?
Bullying, losing my father and going through an eating disorder. They were all very traumatic in my adolescence and occurring simultaneously. I got through it with my the help, belief and love of-  my family, a 9 month hospitalisation, and a self assessment turned into revelation that if my belief system didn’t change neither would my life.   

What advice would you give to your 16 year old self?
Everything you “think” is everything, is flailing. Except what you make! Pick up your instruments god damn it!   

If you could change one thing within society, what would that be?
Physical self obsession. Honestly... stop with it. I don’t care if your T-sections A-symmetry gives me a migraine and an orgasm at once. There’s so much more to life.